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>I was only 9 years old>I loved 4chan so much, I had all the celeb pics and webms>I pray to 4chan every night before bed, thanking him for the life I've been given>"4chan is love" I say; "4chan is life">My dad hears me and calls me a faggot>I know he was just jealous of my devotion for 4chan>I called him a cunt>He slaps me and sends me to go to sleep>I'm crying now, and my face hurts>I lay in bed and it's really cold>Suddenly, a warmth is moving towards me>It's 4chan>I am so happy
He whispers into my ear "This is my board."
>He grabs me with his powerful hacker hands and puts me down onto my hands and knees>I'm ready>I spread my ass-cheeks for 4chan>He penetrates my butt-hole>It hurts so much but I do it for 4chan>I can feel my butt tearing as my eyes start to water>I push against his force>I want to please 4chan>He roars in a mighty roar as he fills my butt with his love>My dad walks in>4chan looks him straight in the eyes and says "Tits or GTFO.">4chan leaves through my window>4chan is love. 4chan is life.