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No.211 : Anonymous [2016-08-16 16:06] [SNAP]
> Be me
> Decide to kill myself since shit country
> Go to hardware store
> Pass Xray to enter
> At least they didn't do the cavity search
> Get some rope
> Get to counter
> Cashier says Ey Mayte ya need a level three security license for that
> Left it at home
> Can't serve ya mayte
> Walk out of store
> Local rozzers haven't caught me breaking the 4:30pm curfew
> Turn corner
> Walk into a group of five 15 year olds
> All high on MCat, Whiz, Herion Cannabis and Spice
> But even paracetamol are illegal
> Get stabbed by bright green knife, smashed with a baseball bat and get jawed w/ brass knuckles
> But even spoons are illegal
> Also illegal to carry for self defence
> Hospitalised
> Didn't pay, but waited for 8 weeks to be seen and came out worse then I went in
> At home now, 2am
> Dindu breaks in
> He rushes me with a knife
> Have tiny rubber mallet next to me in my toolbox
> Got a level 7 builders license motherfucker
> Pick it up
> Dindu stops, walks out if house and goes home
> Mad
> Throw mallet at window
> Mallet bounces off, window fine
> Get called to court 2 days later
> Dindu is suing me for using something as self defence
> I'm 5'7" 132 pounds
> He's 6'8" 211 pounds
> Grabbed it in heat of the moment too
> Lose case, get sued for everything
> Literally homeless
> Die of starvation 4 days later since Dole isn't enough to even survive


> Walking home from friendly gun store
> Just got some more ammo and a new glock
> Dindu walks up to me and pulls a knife
> Is a mugging
> Punch him in face and back up
> Draw gun
> He fucking legs it in the opposite direction
> Get home
> Drinking beer and playing vidya till 2am
> Different dindu breaks in
> Oh hell no motherfucker
> Grab 12 gauge and aim at door since he has to come through
> He appears
> Pull trigger
> Redecorate walls brain red
> Call police
> Police arrive
> First word the cop says is good shot
> Feel happy as someone who can properly defend himself

And which country is called "Great"?


None right now!

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