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2014-01-30 | The Age Reason Podcast, Episode 3 is up:
-> the age reason project, episode 3 - How To Kill Yourself (Without Having To Die)
-> The Age Reason Project, podcast main page
Okay. So, first, some background. I'm turning 17 in a few months. About two years ago I decided that I'm a girl inside, but I always felt like I couldn't do anything about it, so I kinda rolled with it and told myself that if I turn 18 and I still feel the same way then I'd take some sort of serious action. When I was 15 I came out to my mum, and she decided to send me to a psyche. He was awesome, and basically told me that I'm definitely transgendered (which I already knew). One session, he said that he could get me some anti androgens, or estrogen if I wanted them. I go to a very conformist, conservative school full of homophobes so I decided that estrogen was too risky, and told him I'd really like to start t-blockers. So he sent me off to talk to my mum about it. I did. And she stopped sending me. We've barely even talked about the topic since. In any case, I'm getting a debit card soon so I'll be able to buy medication (im looking at spironolactone) off the net. I live in Australia, and I have a few questions about anti-androgens
I also have a few more general questions. Sorry about this, I'm just really lost at the moment. 4. I feel like I need to tell a close male friend about my identity. How should I go about doing this? He's quite introverted and cynical, and that makes it hard to know how he'll react.5. Any tips on making myself more feminine without medication? I have dirty blonde hair and pale skin, if it matters.
Thanks for reading, I hope you can find time to help me out here. Really, it means a lot :)
You are very lucky. verry verry lucky. Just know that first.
I can't talk with a ton of authority, but essentially taking hormones will put you through a female puberty.
You will become infertile after 6 months of hormones, permanently (so spermbank or something). You will (slowly, painfully so) grow breasts that will not go away without surgery. Your voice will not change. You will have mood swings, and your libido will change/decrease.
If you are already growing a beard, it will not stop. If you aren't already growing a beard, it will not start.
Fat will redistribute (marginal hip and buttocks growth) but bone mass will not, so overall your physical stature will not change much. It will be much harder to lose weight and easier to gain it (ergo: diet now so you're at your desired weight when you start)
You will lose muscle mass. Due to this, you will lose strength. It will become more difficult to get and maintain an erection.
Thats all I can think of. Despite all the cons, its probably worth it. Your so lucky you can start so young.
If you want to be more feminine, transition now.
Thanks for your reply
Do these refer to t-blockers or oestrogen? I'm a little bit confused about your message :)
I'm probably not ready to get on oestrogen just yet. (still sorting my life out after some serious break downs)
I'd be hesitant to start estrogen and the supplements without a Doctor's look over, it's better to err on safety (and compared to the hormones themselves, its really not THAT expensive, only a couple hundred dollars (if out of pocket), it's not so bad considering how long you'll be on them). Definitely do it soon but only when youre ready ^_^ They'll do all that irreversible female puberty stuff, so you NEED to be sure. Just flashback to sex ed, female puberty, that's what you'll be getting (minus the period, obviously).
T-blockers are a little different, they will only minimize/eliminate the "damage" testosterone does to your body, and once you go off them your body will go right back to producing hormones if you change your mind, so the "risk" is less so start those if you can. Testosterone is the big culprit because it causes masculine "damage" to your body as you age. Things like facial and bone structure changes (like pronounced brow, the "neanderthal" effect that men have, or pronounced, kevin-sorbo-chin syndrome XD) and, perhaps most importantly, hair loss (if your hairline is indicating anything about loss, mine was already receding in high school, so you might check.) Stopping these things is MUCH more important to passing than having breasts is.
If you make the blockers your priority, you can start the estrogen at your leisure and get near-optimal results, be it in a year or 15 years from now. At 17 you're set to be indistinguishable from a cis-girl if you get on the blockers soon ^_^
As for feminine without the hormones, there are vitamins that will help, like Vitamin A is very good for skin regeneration (and helps with acne to keep you smooth!). And, stick to bladed razors if you're shaving, the scraping promotes collagen production (get what you can out of it while you're stuck with it!).
If you want to focus on pics, learn some things about photography (like, upward facing angles make you look more feminine, by making your eyes seem bigger and chin smaller). When you put on make up (and unless your beard is blonde, you WILL need it, at least a little) avoid dark lipstick, use pinks and MAYBE peach tones, purples and blues and blacks will make you more manly. I don't know WHY but they just DO XD Also, depending on your hair, you might consider investing in a wig, there are some VERY good ones for cheap online (I use wowwigs myself), something cheap if dressing up is going to be scarce for you (as you are still living at home i take it in a non-supportive environment) a 30 dollar one might be a good investment. If you want a more "full time" one those run about 2-300 dollars, with the REAL fancy human hair ones up at around 1,000 (or more). Again, this all depends what your hair looks like =P Mine has been thinning for a while, and personally once the pressure was OFF to try and cope with it, to keep checking it in the mirror, I felt a lot better, like I could concentrate more on other things, and having fun XD At least until I can get it restored.
There are also "ghetto" sources, such as, bottled water, which due to reactions between water and plastic introduces tiny (TINY, mind you) doses of chemicals that mimic estrogen. There are also herbal supplements that claim they help breast growth but I've never tried them.
Again this is all generic help info, depending on how heavy your beard is, size of your body, etc you may want to emphasize certain traits over others, HENCE, my recommendation to have -some- professional help, even if its just checking in every few months, so don't take any of this as gospel. XD Hope it points you closer to your goal though.
Wow, thank you so much for that post. A lot of that information is really helpful (though I'd already figured out the feminine camera angle haha, hours in my room with my phone taught me a lot). I'm 17 now, and as to my body, I have a bit of facial hair on my upper lip but it's easily managable with shaving every few days. I'm about 60 kilograms, and I'm just below average height. To me it sounds like the best way to go is with blockers. Are there any non-prescription sites i can get these from? I live in Australia.
Thanks again for your reply, you're wonderful :)